Money - Something We Lack

Money is something we can't live without. Money is that paper that we require to get by in society. Money, Money, Money. That's what my mom has been reminding me off this pass few days. She tells me that my brother does not help around the house, she tells me that she is tired of having to deal with the houses payments and that if we loose the house that she will get an apartment with one room. That is telling me that I should have my own place too. But that is something I don't have. Sure, I've tired to get others jobs (get more money) but I'm limited of where I can apply. Why? Simply, I will blame my mom of that reason. But I will also thank her for giving me the opportunity of having a better education, better life. But this doesn't fell like a good life right now.

I pay at least one bill of the house and that's the phone, the internet and the personal cell phones that me and my brother use. FUCK FUCK FUCK. I'm pissed off right now all because of my mom. Fuck. I hate when she does this to me.

Yesterday she told us to go buy some groceries and I first when alone (I figured, I'll just tell my brother t0 pay me half of the bill) and then when I called HER to ask what kind of tomato she wanted she asked me who was with me and I told her that I was alone. Man what a mistake. My mom started bitching about how my brother doesn't do anything around the house. I don't understand where she gets all this Ideas.

But then again I don't see when Hugo contributes to the house either. He does seem to spend a lot of time locked up in the room playing videos games for hours without end. Even staying up till 3 or 4 in the morning. But that's having fun and I don't see any wrong with that. But then, does he contribute to the electricity bill? Does he pay for the amount of electricity he used up while playing on the Xbox while also using the surround sound system? My guest is no from what my mom has been telling me. But then, I myself stay up that late surfing the internet. Does a laptop use up as much electricity as an Xbox? What about all those electric appliances that are connected? Don't they use a fair amount of electricity even in standby mode? The only times I've seen my brother pay for something is when he is 'forced' to use he's money for the house. I seen him pay some bills but I guess my mother does not see that as a good enough contribution. What is it that we have to do? Maybe my brother should not play video games that late and maybe he's appearance will change.

When my brother is not home he's either working or at school and when he is, he's usually in the room playing a game. The reason for he been in the room is simple; for he's entertainment after a long day of work or school. But I don't work as much as him and I think that because of that and the fact that I'm paying for a bill that she thinks that my brother isn't paying for anything in the house. I think my brother has to give her money, show it t her face, tell her "here is my payment and contribution to the house, I'm active in this house." Active... Now that I think about it too, if my brother doesn't seems to be active around the house then that also adds to the reason of my mom blaming my brother for not doing anything around the house. If he just simply cleaned the yard, washed some dishes, cleaned the floor, or did anything productive that my mom could see then that would change her mind about my brother. She has told me that and I quote this "your brother just expects us to do everything around the house. Its only you, me and Javier that do anything around the house." And I have seen evidence of this many times, especially when he's in the room playing a video game. He doesn't bother to ask to help and then just comes out demanding to know if the food is ready, eats and goes back into the room.

But I don't think like that though, but then maybe I need to open my eyes more. I know that I too must worry my mom too. With not working enough hours, only having one job, not making enough money. I'm sure that I need to improve a lot of things about myself. I wish that I had my own place, a girlfriend (maybe be married and hopefully getting permanent residency), a car. The list can go on and on. There is not one day I don't worry about my future. What am I going to do a month from now, where am I gonna be a year from now? Where's my education taking me? Am I going the right way? Maybe I'm not trying hard enough. And to think I could have been a millionaire right now and all this stuff I wouldn't have to worry about. The future would have been set for me. My family and friend would have had it easy. But life isn't always fare.
For now that's all have to say.

Hopefully whatever is going wrong in this family will be resolved some time soon.